New Year, wins are near.

New Year, wins are near.


Published on 3rd January 2010 11:20



When the clock struck midnight and the calendar turned to a new decade, most of us, after clearing the Sanatogen and Benylin from our systems, decide that we going to change something about ourselves that we could do on our own any other day of the year. It's a good excuse to make it seem like we are improving ourselves. Why should the 14 F1 teams be any different? Here's my resolution for each of them -- some serious and some… not so.

McLaren. Spend the season hoping for no more embarrassment or fines from their employees and praying for no ego struggle between their pair of drivers.

Mercedes. Hope against hope that Michaels seven vertebrae hold out until Vettel can replace him in 2011 and that he can reproduce some of his former glories.

Red Bull. Make sure everyone has attended the rules meetings and haven’t missed any, like the double difusers that gifted Brawn a six race lead last year.

Ferrari. Employ a team of relationship advisers to ensure that Alonso understands that he is part of a team. After all, it’s their last year in F1.

Sauber. To enjoy the freedom that comes from not having to deal with with large motor manufacturers and internal politics that blew what should have been their break-through season in 2009.

Williams. Develop a time machine that will take them back to 1997 when the world was a better place for them, also to find some way of galvanising Barrichello into the driver he was ten years ago.

Renault. Anything will be an improvement on last year. Never re-hire anyone called Flavio, ever. Hope Singapore will be dropped from the series so they don’t have to be reminded of it every time.

Force India. Find out what they did right for three races last year and repeat it, maybe it was as simple as Fisichella leaving for Ferrari..that must still have them chuckling in Dadford Road.

Toro Rosso. Resolve that at no point in the season are they ever going to admit – “we preferred racing with the Red Bull chassis.”

Lotus F1. Seriously, send someone around to Petronas to find out why they didn’t send just a little of their advertising budget to their hometown team. Oh, Mercedes, that’s why.

Virgin Racing. Treat those Manor boys well, as a thousand bad media headlines are being planned right now. Virgin on the ridiculous, etc etc.

CamposMeta 1. Spend most of the year congratulating ourselves ongetting the Senna name back into F1; even if he parks it in the gravel trap in every race, Campos are on to a media winner.

US F1. Sit back with a satisfied smile, knowing that they are backed by that Hurley chap from You Tube and have 40 million motorsport fans back at home. All they need for success is...